Ever had anything bad happen to you? Anything that really crawled under your skin? Something you feel like you never got closure on?

How long have you let it eat away at you…how long did you run around complaining about it and inflicting your negativity not only on yourself but on all those around you?

What good did it do? Did it help you in any way? Did it help anyone around you in any way?

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Without being too specific, I will just say that a while back “things” happened that left someone very unhappy with me. In all honesty, I had just as much reason to be upset with him, however, I never really was.

In short, things didn’t go exactly the way this person had wanted, even though I did everything in my power to help resolve the matter (and he even agrees that I did), he walked away very un-happy.

It’s been months and months now and I’ve since completely forgotten about it. The only time I am reminded about it is when I hear this person is (yet again) publicly making remarks about his displeasure.

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Initially I used to get very upset and confused about why this person is acting this way. However, I recently had a moment of “epiphany.” You see, I know this person, he’s not a bad guy – the opposite actually, he’s an awesome person (good heart and all).

So, when I decided to put myself in his shoes, I realized that for him to STILL be so bitter that he continues to make remarks, he must really have been hurt or even traumatized from what happened. See, for me, it was not a big deal, like politics, I was used to it all – however, for him it was all BRAND new.

Rather than being upset with him, I now try to better understand his side. I guess he’s still very upset/hurt and the reason he continues to make “sly” remarks every now and then is because he needs a release (a pressure valve to open).

But what good is it doing?

It’s not hurting me (maybe irritating me a little). However, it is bothering him obviously. It’s bringing negativity to him and those who he makes the remarks to.

Whatever needs to be done, he needs to do SOMETHING to gain closure – it’s just not good to keep carrying it around.

2 lessons today:

1. Before you react to someone, take a minute and put yourself in their shoes. You may still not agree with what they did, but I promise you’ll better understand them.

2. LET GO! I don’t care what you have to do, but find a way to let go. Negativity can become a plague, not only bringing you down, but all those around you who you care the most for.

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