I had planned to write a post today about the “power of honesty & truth” and one of our customers from PPC Classroom made a comment that is a great lead-in to my point…

Here’s what he said (right on this blog, here…):

“…I think you did great by boldly accepting that things did go wrong and offering huge bonuses. I can’t even imagine how freaky the situation might have been considering it was a mega launch and the expectations were high.”

Abhijeet was commenting on a post where I discussed a massive failure we had during the biggest product launch of the company’s history. It was a huge nuclear meltdown after months of work and THOUSANDS of people anticipating…

Here’s what happened…

We planned for a long time and had set to launch a product on Day X and Time Y. Everything was perfect. The pre-launch buzz was HUGE, people were running, stampeding and tripping over each other to get into the course.

We had TONS of promotional partners & an amazing product.

Now, in this industry, we’re used to seeing servers MELT the minute a product is launched. It’s happened to 80% of launches for years (no joke) - so you’d think we would learn, right?

Well, our company spent close to $12,000 preparing and getting a crazy server set-up.

Yet…the minute we launched - KA BOOM! it all exploded and eggs were thrown in our faces.

Now, instead of the biggest launch in history, we had…

-> Irrate customers
-> Support e-mails/calls flying in
-> UPSET promotional partners
-> Overloaded/Under-slept team members

You name it…we had it…

So we’re embarrassed, scared, shocked and darn right humiliated…what now?

Well, we chose to go down the route of HONESTY. Rather than make up some “gimmicky” message saying, “Oh, we’re so awesome, we had so much traffic, it all exploded” - no…that was not the truth. Yes, we had tons of traffic, but THAT’s not why we exploded.

We wanted to take the high ground.

We sucked it up and immediately apologized.

I made a video for the promotional partners, I let the customers know and we just worked on getting the system back up.

…When finally up - it was time to make it up to everyone.

Now, we sat down and thought “what can we do that will blow everyone away and really make them happy with us again…”

Yes, this was going to mean taking money OUT of OUR pockets - but you know what? WE screwed up and we needed to make it up to everyone who’s time was wasted.

So, we did it.

The end result?

Believe it or not, but we are actually MORE respected in the industry for it. Almost a “blessing in disguise” - I said ALMOST.

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Lesson of the day: Sometimes you need to turn the salesman off. Accept what happened, stick your tail between your legs and own up to it. Be HONEST.

You’ll be surprised how far honesty with others can take you. Most humans, by nature, are incredibly forgiving - all you have to do is ask for their forgiveness.

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For those of you wondering where the heck I’ve been the last month, there you go - I’ve been under my desk!

Of course I’m only kidding, I only spent a few hours there

But it does bring up an interesting question - why was I down there to begin with?

Here’s what’s been going on the last couple of months…

We had an ENORMOUS product launch, the biggest in our company’s history and to say “we had some problems along the way” would be an understatement!

We launched a huge brand new eLearning system and well, it crashed. We also brought in over 6,200 customers so you can imagine - every time someone so much as “farted” inside the system, we got TONS of emails!

But, you know what? I have NO bad news to report - only good news.

I’ve Never Learned So Much About Myself & My Business…

This launch really was the moment of truth for us and a test to the will, power and “fighter mentality” for everyone on the team.

I learned a TREMENDOUS amount about my own fighter mentality and also that of those on our team.

I also have great lessons that came out of it - things I will share over the coming days with you right here on this blog.

We’ll start with the first lesson today…

It’s OK To Freak Out - Just Do It Fast…

Look, we’re all human and it’s only natural for us to “lose it” or get overwhelmed. Being a fighter does not mean you’re not allowed a moment of weakness.

Being a fighter means you can recollect yourself fast and snap out of it.

Let me give you a story I remembered while I was under my desk…

This Lesson Brought To You By a TV SHOW - “Lost”

Background of the show: A plane mysteriously crashes on an island. Lots of people die but lots also survive. The island is weird and lots of unexplainable things are happening - people are still dying; everyone is scared out of their minds.

As in all crisis moments in life, a leader rises to the occasion. His name is “Jack” and he’s a spinal surgeon back in the ‘real world.’

He gathers everyone and starts to provide structure.

During the first season, something horribly horrifying is happening that they don’t understand and he needs to take a moment to calm down his “right-hand man” - who happens to be a woman (Kate).

She’s on the verge of a breakdown and asks him how he is keeping his cool.

Here’s what he says (I’m paraphrasing, I don’t remember exactly what he said):

“I was once in a surgery, life-threatening surgery, one small mistake and the patient would be dead and it would be MY fault. Well, it was one of my first surgeries and it was a very serious case…

I’m in the process of the surgery and I did something wrong, something terribly wrong - I had the patients entire back open and all her spinal nerves exposed.

Whatever I did caused ALL of her spinal nerves to pour out of her like spaghetti - I had basically sentenced this woman to death - holy sh** what had I just done?

Panic came over me, I freaked out and I filled with fear…here’s what I did:

(Pay attention to this part - it changed the way I handle crisis moments…)

I told myself ‘Jack, it’s OK to be afraid…here’s what we’ll do - go ahead and freak out, go nuts, lose your mind, fill yourself with fear - but do it for FIVE seconds. That’s it.’

Jack goes on to say: ‘I counted down from 5 to 1 and I let fear overtake me, but the instant my 5 seconds were over, I cleared my mind, got rid of the fear and FOCUSED. I fixed the problem and the woman survived and is living a healthy life.’

So what’s the moral of that long paraphrasing?

It’s OK To Be Afraid - Just Get Over It Fast!

Look, the launch that went sour this past month for us, the results could have been catastrophic - my name/reputation/team - everything I spent 4 years building could have been gone in the snap of a finger.

Scary eh?

And, yes, I WAS afraid. But, when I was under that desk - I told myself:

“Your team, your business, your customers - they need you right now, people are counting on you. It’s OK that you’re afraid, just let it overtake you for a minute or so - don’t fight the fear, let it come…

BUT, after that, shut up, sit up and get it done!”

What was the result?

The result was a record-breaking launch not only for the company but for our entire industry.

I’m actually being PRAISED and RESPECTED for the way we handled the aftermath - it’s freaky but it’s almost like it HELPED us. That, my friends, is called making lemonade out of lemon!

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The moral of the story is to NOT fight back against fear - let it come, accept it, acknowledge it, even let it overtake you. BUT, always control it.

YOU tell it when it can come in and YOU tell it when it has to leave. Let it come in for just a bit, then kick it out, re-focus and bring the fighter back out to solve the crisis.

Till next time…

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** This post has been dedicated to 2 Indians who actually got Tshirts printed with this blog on them! hahaha…

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Quick post today about a BIG lesson I’m learning hands-on right now.

Here’s the background story:

We’re in the middle of a product launch right now and so we’re talking to a lot of “promotional partners” and trying to convince them to promote for our new product.

The best scenario for us is if they promote at least once or twice during or “pre-launch buzz building” and then do another few promotions AFTER we launch…

The problem is that some of our BIG promoters are VERY busy people. They have tons of projects on their plate and even more promotional committments.

So, time is scarce, I feel lucky enough just having them AGREE to promote, much less how MANY promotions they’ll do.

But, the bottom line is that we will have a much bigger success IF they pre-promote.

Just yesterday I had an e-mail from one of these partners (one of the biggest ones in our industry) and he had agreed earlier to promote our product. He sent me an email flat out asking me:

What day do you want me to promote?

Now, I sat back and thought about what to say? From the phrasing of the question, he seemed to be making it clear that I had ONE day and ONE promotion to get out of it - what day did I feel I could get the MOST out of it?

I was a bit dissapointed because I really wanted him to do more than one promotion. However, I was afraid that if I asked for that, I’d offend him or sound greedy.

But, before I replied with my assumption in mind, I figured that I really had nothing to lose. I had to PUSH here. I had to get the HUSTLE into this!

So, my response flat out asked him to do a pre-promotion and post-promotion. I’ll admit that I was a bit nervous.

This morning, I woke up and received a message from him asking me for some promotional material to send his way…

Wait…did he just agree to do it?!  I think so!

A small example, but an iron clad one for sure. Had I “assumed” something and not asked, I would be stuck with just one promotion. However, since I just got over my “fear” and asked him, I’m now getting exactly what I wanted!

The worst thing that can happen when you ask is that they say “no.” Big deal, you’ve been hearing no your entire life! But, even if there is a .1% chance that they’ll say yes, GO FOR IT!

( By the way, I DID have another promotional partner flat out say no. So what? I’m still alive and he’s still promoting on launch day. I lost NOTHING, only had something to gain. )

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So, I was scheduled to fly out today (out of the country). I had my flight leaving Washington, Dulles Airport at 5:05 PM and running a connection through New York (JFK).

It hit 5 PM and they announced that our plane had not even left it’s other destination yet, but that it would come (don’t worry everyone).

Then, at 6 PM, they suddenly just canceled the flight! My connecting flight was at 8:55 PM and this left me little room to do anything.

All the passengers got in the herendous line to get help from the rediculously mean women at the counter. I had two options:

1. Follow suit and get in line and pray for the best.

2. Take things into my own hands and CALL Delta.

I did the latter and although it took me a good 30 minutes on the phone, we came to an agreeable alternate solution (which has me leaving tomorrow). However, there were many times that the call tested my patience. As nice as the woman was on the phone, some of her rediculously imposed red-tape was seriously starting to pi** me off!

“But I Kept My Cool…I Kept On Smiling…”

I almost lost my cool, but I made a conscious decision not to. I was watching what was happening down the line from people who were flaring their arms around and acting like monkeys.

They were getting the same rudness in return and ended up with results they were not happy with.

I, however, kept asking the attendent on the phone to place herself in my shoes and to be fair. The more I talked to her as a PERSON and REASONED, the further I got to getting a desirable result!

In the end, I got a great outcome and was very happy with it.

Then It Happened Again!

As I got home, I had to call the hotel and change my reservation and I already knew that they were going to try to charge me the day because I was within 24 hours. However, IT WASN’T MY FAULT!

Plus, I had extended my stay by one more day, so they were still going to get the same number of nights from me. When I called, the initial reaction was the same “no sir, we have to charge.”

I immediately asked for the supervisor (very nicely) and I made my case. However, STILL they didn’t listen!

Again, about to lose my cool to people who are being unreasonable, but then I remembered…

I realized that I could just call the corporate office and reason with them given my high points with them. So, that’s what I did. The representative was GREAT. She immediately called the hotel on my behalf and argued my case.

Eventually, the entire matter got handled and I have to pay nothing.

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Here’s what I learned…

I’ve watched my own father handle these situations and he’s a firm believer in “ATTACK hard and you get your way…” - Many times I’ve felt that he’s too fast to yell, shout and throw around threats, I’m starting to think that I may be right.

Given that I run my own business, lately I’ve actually been LESS likely to help someone if they call kicking and screaming then someone who calls reasoning with me on logic and nicely asking for HELP.

My Advice To You Is This - Don’t be that guy in line who was flaring his arms around and shouting - it won’t get you what you want. Take a deep breath, nicely ask for help and reason by asking the other person to place themselves in your shoes (while also placing YOURSELF in their shoes so they know it’s a two way street).

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“Thank you so much, you do such a great job, I wish I could do it this well…”

Sound a bit too mushy for you? Well, either way, try it. It can make a major impact on someone.

Yesterday night, around 9 PM my phone rang, it was my sister. I picked up and she said that my brother-in-law wanted to talk to me.

Some Back-story for you:

My sister is applying to medical residency programs and wanted me to edit her personal statements. I was cursed (I mean blessed ) with being a good writer. Funny thing because “writing” was the only thing I got a B in in high school (screwed up my 4.0 GPA).

Thanks to learning how to copywrite from Justin Ford, I do write very well now.

Anyways, I digress in self flattery…

She has two essays, one of them I had re-done and sent to her the night before. I was extremely tired when I edited it, it was NOT my best work, but still felt it was much better than the original draft.

My brother-in-law had called JUST to thank me. First of all, mind you, this favor was for my SISTER, not him. However, he said he was so incredibly impressed with my ability to write that he just had to call and say thanks (I’ve written things for them in the past as well, so he’s seen me at work in the past).

His exact words:

“Man…thank you so much…I just don’t get how you do these so well, it was amazing. Keep this up and you’re going to take over the world!”

(Obviously he got a bit exaggerated, I have no plans to try to take over the world).

The entire conversation lasted less than 2 minutes and I was glowing from ear to ear!

My sister had already thanked me. They weren’t telling me something I didn’t already know. Yet, him taking that extra step to make a phone call out of his way SPECIFICALLY to appreciate and acknowledge me went a long way for me.

Next time either of them needs a favor, I’ll be 10 times happier to do it for them versus someone else.

Lesson to take away - Take a minute every day or at least once a week and appreciate someone near you. Your wife, kids, co-worker, boss, kid’s teacher, employee, the local cross-guard - anyone, just do it.

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What you learn today: The structure to follow to peacefully and powerfully resolve a conflict.

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Yesterday I got a call from someone who works with me letting me know that I was going to have to step in as an “authority” on a call to help resolve a disagreement that was fast turning ugly. Here’s what the problem was for me, on a personal level, I’m friends with everyone involved.

Either side I take, I risk fighting with those I respect and like.

However, at the same time, I felt strongly about one side (professionally) and had no choice but to “take a side” and represent it.

For hours I thought about how to proceed so as to have the best consequence and my mind kept running through scenarios that all resulted in a big blow up - needless to say I was a bit nervous and apprehensive.

However, I realized one thing: A leader needs to be able to peacefully resolve conflicts, a leader needs to make sure all voices are heard, but also a leader needs to be able to stand strong and make a decision (even if everyone does not like it).

An indecisive leader is not only ineffective but will never have anyone’s respect.

Resorting To “Active Listening” - My Version of It…

I made a decision to handle the call in the following format:

1. Start by saying that I was there to hear all sides.
2. Summarize the concerns as “I” know them and ask the other party to confirm.
3. Ask the other party to spend some time to voice details of their concern.
4. Summarize what I heard.
5. State my side (without being combative or pointing fingers) - I would make it very clear that I was speaking my mind openly and meant no disrespect.
6. Give time for rebuttal or further concerns.
7. Explain my position one last time.
8. State how I would be moving forward.
9. Thank everyone for their time.

–> Through this entire call, I was very good about consistently reminding all parties that this was a PROFESSIONAL disagreement and was NOT personal and so nothing said should be taken personally.

I think it’s easier said than done, but the end result was fairly impressive and although we didn’t walk away “loving” each other, I do think it was fairly cordial and we’ll all get over it soon enough and that it was for the best in the long-run.

Did I Follow My Outline During The ACTUAL Call?

With the exception of a few distractions, I was very shocked that I really DID follow the outline above and it worked amazingly.

The best part about the outline above is that it makes the opposing party feel that you really ARE hearing them and are trying to work with them. However, at the same time, the outline above allows YOU to take and stay in control of the dispute and the eventual resolution.

I highly recommend that you study the outline above and implement it into ALL conflict resolutions.

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What you learn today: Do you get uncomfortable with silence? Feel the need to talk to replace it? Do you get antsy when you don’t hear an answer? Here’s an exercise…

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Have you ever noticed how intimidating silence can be? Most of us innately feel the need to talk and fill in silence, what we don’t realize is that we’re showing too many of our cards when we talk too much.

The less you share many times, the more cards you have on your side…

This may sound vindictive, but it’s the truth. A big part of being a successful fighter is winning debates, negotiations and winning over people. Many times, the key here is to keep an upper-hand, know someone else’s “touch points” without revealing yours.

I’ve noticed that when I talk too much or am too aggressive, I end up being on the “needy” side of things and lose control over the “fight.”

Here’s an exercise I’ve been working on and I welcome you to join as well…(I encourage you to join):

PRACTICE SILENCE & PATIENCE

Let’s use an example…say you’ve just made an offer on a car and it’s been 10 hours and the sales guy has not called you back - FINE, DON’T CALL HIM!

The minute you all him, the message you’ve sent is that you’re desperate and have nothing better to sit around and think about. He gets the upper hand and your dealing power decreases.

OR, the next time you’re trying to get something your way - mention it and then DON’T defend it. Keep quiet, let the other person talk and talk, listen to them and gather your argument points.

When you DO talk, make it razor sharp and to the point.

Silence is golden (as they’ve said) - especially when you’re negotiating…

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…the first question you should be able to answer for someone…

What you learn today: Face it, you want someone’s help? What’s in it for them? Never ask for anything without thinking about this first…

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Before I get cynical on man-kind, let me start by saying that there are many people in the world still who will help with nothing in mind (for the pure joy of helping).

However, even for THEM, if you can create a “win-win” situation, you’re going to succeed far faster than one who does not.

Let me take a personal example. I have a great mentor who has coached me for the last 3 years on all areas of my life from personal to professional. He has been there for me anytime I have needed him and has really pulled me out of binds.

He has NEVER asked for a single thing in return. It’s because of that that I’d probably step in front of a moving bus for him.

So, did I just keep using and using?

Nope. Last year, when I was in position to reward him for his great advice, I did. I made it equitable for him to help me. Now every time he helps me, he gets something out of it too. He never asked me, but the result is just human nature. He feels appreciated and rewarded - that alone makes him that much more likely to help me and continue working with me.

Being selfish will kill you in this game…

A true fighter knows that he/she needs many soldiers on their side. Sure, your “army” may keep giving to you, they’ll be loyal and stand by your side day in and day out.

However, let me promise you this…

EVENTUALLY, if you’re always the one asking and never giving, that loyalty will seize to exist. 

Lesson: EVERY decision you make, EVERY action you take - think about how it impacts those around you. Even if it means doing something that means a BIT less for you, but then something for everyone around you - do it.

Give a little and you’ll be amazed at the results, it all comes back 10 fold (maybe it’s karma)?

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What You’re About To Learn: Why asking for advice from “anyone” is not as helpful as you may think…

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When I was first looking to start a business I remember all the negativity. I was only 19 and everyone told me I couldn’t do it, not possible, I had no experience, no money, blah blah blah.

Needless to say, I was pretty deflated.

It was then that I heard someone say “take the advice of those who are where you want to be…not anyone and everyone who decides to offer it.”

Here’s what I mean…

Let’s say you want to learn how to fly, would you ask someone who has never flown to teach you?

NO!

Then why do you run around asking people for advice who are obviously not fit to provide it.

Before you ask anyone for advice, ask yourself - is this person where I want to be in my life? For example, is this person a pilot?

If the answer is no, keep your mouth shut and move on to someone else more qualified to give advice on that topic.

The more I live my life, I’m finding that “advice” is pretty useless most of the time. Those who are truly qualified to give advice (true mentors) are usually smart enough to only GUIDE you and never tell you what to do. My first warning sign now for bad advice is when someone tells me what to do rather than just try to guide me (even if they are or have been where I want to go).

** Please don’t get me wrong, if it was not for good advice, I would not be who I am today. But for every piece of GOOD advice I get, I usually end up also getting 10 pieces of useless advice. You need to learn to hear through the noise…

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They like their own…

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What You’re About To Learn: Learn how to present your ideas to others so it gets accepted. If you present it as YOUR idea, most won’t like the idea right off the bat.

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A very interesting lesson I’m learning the more I dive into the “sales” role in our company has been how to position my sales pitch. I’m using these strategies to close “corporate accounts” but the strategies are not different for your everyday life (I use these new findings with my friends and family all the time).

The basic lesson is that when you want someone to do something, it’s your idea, not theirs, right? Your natural instinct is to go in and “convince” people, to make a case for why they should agree with you.

You’re going about it the wrong way, just like I always did…

I’ve since learned the art of “leading people into my own decisions…”

Don’t Convince Someone, Lead Someone…

Think of it this way, how likely are you to buy something when it’s YOUR own idea rather than if it’s someone else hounding on you to buy it.

Or, how likely are you to “start exercising” because you have yourself decided you need to lose weight, rather than having your friend tell you that you’re fat. You’ll actually resent your friend rather than listen to them.

Same goes with every other decision you need someone to make - ESPECIALLY at work. Are you trying to convince your boss to do something? Well, good luck, you’ll likely have very little success.

The art of getting your ideas accepted…

Don’t come right out and present your idea and start defending it. Do the opposite. Ask probing questions, questions that lead to answers which obviously lead to your idea.

Great sales people are the masters at doing this with Yes/No questions.

Let’s Assume You’re Trying To Sell Someone Something…

Let’s say it’s a “sales team management” software. You call a client and want to initiate a sale. Instinct would be to start telling them about all the great features and all the problems it solves, right?

Try this instead…

Start the call by asking them questions…

Background Information:

-> How many sales agents do you have?
-> What do they currently do the manage their leads?
-> etc…

PROBING Questions:

-> Wouldn’t you agree that “managing your follow-up calls” is a big problem John?
* Notice how I didn’t ask “what are your problems” but am leading John towards talking about a problem I have a solution for.

* I’d like ask some follow-up probing questions to his answer based on his reply - always keeping the conversation pointing towards problems my software solves.

-> John, you’re saying that you your inefficiencies probably mean you forget to follow-up with 30% of your customers right? If you even closed 10% of those, that means you’re missing out on 3% of overall sales - I guess that amounts to about $100,000 in revenue PER sales agent?

Wow, really sorry to hear that, that’s definitely a problem and I can see why it hurts so much!

* Notice how I’m starting to get John to really THINK about the problem and how bit it really is in the sense of lost revenue.

-> John, you’re probably also having multiple agents calling the same people right?

* Leads to another feature of the software…

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Anyways, you get the point. The above questions are all LEADING to John thinking up his OWN solution. John will probably come out of this thinking - “Yea! Wow, if someone could just create some automated solution for this, I’d save so much money!”

Congratulations! You’ve officially GIVEN YOUR idea to John and he just sold HIMSELF.

I know I just used a business example, but think about it - you can use things like this anywhere with anyone.

The basic idea is to always “LEAD people into a decision that you want” rather than to ask them to “MAKE a decision on that you want…”

Being a fighter means having full control on the situations around you and being able to fight for your own ideas is a huge part of it.

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